June 21, 2010

Understanding Frustration and Anger in Children

WHAT MAKES CHILDREN FRUSTRATED?
Children with difficult temperaments have difficulty reading the small cues that other children send out in social situations. A five-year-old may want to join another who is building with blocks or playing at the play ground. The aggressive child (the one with the blocks or the one on the swing) may think that the new child is trying to take his toys or take the swing. He may protect his territory by striking the child. If you have a child who gets aggressive, you need to prepare him/her by telling him that he may have to share toys or take turns. Let your child know that the new child just wants to be friends with him. Coach your child by telling him what he should say if he does not want to share. (e.g., “I would rather play by myself today.” )
TIPS ON TEACHING YOUNG CHILDREN TO BE CARING

*Share together. Have a time when each child has the opportunity to share with the family and tell about their day.
*Build self esteem. Give your children positive feedback throughout the day.
*Teach responsibility. Take some time to plan the day together. If the next day is a school day, have your child get things ready the evening before. If it is a weekend, have you child help plan the activities and help with the preparation.
*Sit together twice a day and discuss how the day is going, read a book together, or play a game.
*Reduce the stress of transition. Discuss the daily schedule before it happens and have activities that help with the transitions (songs, games).
*Share the control. Let your child develop rules that relate to caring behaviors (being kind, helping each other). Post these on wall or the refrigerator where everyone sees them during the day.

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